pour moi

this isn't for you.  it's for me.  because something has to give.  because things can't stay the same.  i need to act.  do.  breathe.  smile.  i can't let myself stay here any more.  

i'm tired of asking the same questions.  i'm sick of not having any answers.  maybe i loved and maybe i lost and maybe that's better than nothing and maybe it's worse.  but i've had enough.  i don't want to wonder and i don't want to take up any more willpower or mental energy trying SO HARD for the sake of trying.  

he fucked up.  and so did i.  the lesson to learn is that this relationship was wrong for many reasons, from the very start.  and regardless of the past, which can't be changed, and regardless of the future, which can't be foretold, i am left with a choice right now.  i can think about things, and wonder who/what/when/where/why and how.  or i can let go.  relinquish all control.  release.

i choose freedom.

my only rules:  be polite.  don't play games.  say yes to the things that make you smile.  say no to the things that don't.  don't think about the past or anything else that makes you cringe.  don't wonder about the future.  relax your belly.  do yoga.  meditate.  create.  learn more.  love everyone.  inhale deeply.  exhale fully.

On Letting Go by Sally Kempton